I Maybe Possibly Have Lost It All Together

It's true. I'm losing my mind. How do I know this? Let me count the ways...

1. I lost my phone last week on my way to Maine. Somewhere between Salt Lake City, and New York City. I think. I was positive I left it on the plane, but now I'm doing that whole "maybe I had it in Times Square?" Or "did I have it at Starbucks?" "Did I give it to someone to hold?" "Maybe that weird chick with the boots who was eyeing me in the bathroom took it?" People - don't go down this road. It is a slippery slope. One that will lead you to call Tmobile 5 times until you get the one customer service representative that will indeed tell you that yes your phone was in NEW YORK CITY even though they shouldn't be divulging that kind of information, but you've cried and pleaded and spent 12 minutes explaining what your phone means to you, all of the numbers and contacts that are nowhere else, and how you're depressed about all of the text messages you're sure to be getting over this holiday weekend that you're going to miss. And when she says "Well surely you've backed it up?" you quickly hang up. Because you haven't. Because you haven't gotten that far in phone 101. Because you suck.

2. Jess's phone decided to shit the bed. Only because I lost my phone. I haven't checked my messages in 48 hours. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I am just positive that I have 24 messages all from buyer's ready to put offers on my real estate listings but I am not responsive. AHHHHHHH.

3.  Jess and I went for a trail run in Maine yesterday. In a bog without bug repellent. I won't even tell you the places I have bug bites.

4. It's 2:30am and I am wide awake. The 3 hour nap on the plane was not a good idea.

5. I'm moving to Germany and still am completely averse to learning the language. No bueno. See?

Tomorrow we should talk about deep breathing and meditation, no?

Comments

[beaux]

That's awful. I hope you get things straightened out.

[Mel]

This is a no bingo if I've ever heard of one.